Sex during Pregnancy

Many expectant mothers and fathers are concerned about sex during pregnancy and whether or not it is possible to engage in this type of activity at all. Women you all will agree that pregnancy can change our appetite for many of life’s simple little pleasures. Tasks as simple as making breakfast, doing the laundry to even making love may be adversely affected. Some women admit to having an increase in their sexual desire while pregnant while on the other hand some women just don’t want to know.

Your feeling about sex while pregnant I reckon largely depends on your own individual feeling towards it, your partner’s feeling and your emotional and physical state of mind during this special time. One thing is certain; while pregnant you will without a doubt feel different about sex. Some couples or partners embrace this change while others are pressured by it which results in a change to the dynamic to a once strong relationship. Many women become more easily aroused during this time and are just ready to pounce on their partner at any given opportunity which men are just too pleased to have this happening as this makes them find their girlfriend or wife even more desirable. Thing is, unlike pre pregnancy he may find that he doesn’t have to work as hard because his partner is easily aroused resulting in her climaxing much quicker and quite frequently. Some men tend to find their other half sexier during this time, which I think is a combination of her changing form namely larger boobs and seemingly always being a cat in heat.

While some couples report their sex lives to being a peak erotic time, there are others who experience a down turn or having ups and downs. All this is normal and the good news is it can be fixed with a little extra effort on both sides. Once both are willing to acknowledge the difference during the months of pregnancy and beyond and communicate their feelings, each will find it easier to adjust to the change. In the first trimester sexual intercourse may be affected by fatigue alongside nausea and fear of loosing the pregnancy, so sex becomes a burdensome chore rather than a pleasurable encounter. The second trimester, known also as the pregnancy honeymoon is characterised by the hormonal fluctuations settling down. Morning sickness and fatigue taper off, the fear of miscarriage lessens as you have passed the critical twelve weeks and statistics show the risk of miscarriages decrease during this time as well. As the eroticism of the partner increases the man may feel it was worth the wait. Many women during this time report an increased sensitivity to their erogenous zones making them more enthusiastic. The final months can be tricky as you may find that owing to your body shape you may have become too large, too awkward and quite preoccupied with what lies ahead, namely the birthing process.

It is necessary to mention a few of the physical changes during pregnancy. Because of the increased blood flow to the muscles and lining of the vagina, there is an increased fullness particularly in that area. For some this can be a positive, while others find it uncomfortable. You should also note that as vaginal secretions increase the odour changes as well. As long as you take a bath once or twice a day, properly drying the area and keeping it clean, there should be no need for concern. If however you find that there is a malodorous smell, see your doctor as it may be indicative of bacterial vaginosis or some related infection. This aside, the increased vaginal secretions accent sexual enjoyment for some if not all couples. You may also notice that there may also be slight bleeding during intercourse as the cervix has increased blood supply which is caused by the breaking of the tiny blood vessels at the tip of the cervix. In this instance it is best to avoid deep penetration which will lessen this. If for some reason the bleeding persists and increases you should consult your midwife or seek your physician immediately.

During this time both should note that communication is vitally important. I cannot stress this point enough. Unless both express what is pleasurable or uncomfortable, it will gradually put a strain on both parties. So some useful tips to make your time together memorable before the addition of the little one has to be that both you and your partner are mindful of the changing size of your body. Both should consider what is being gained, ( no pun intended) and not what is being lost. The roundness of your body is only providing more surface areas for your partner to touch and explore. Remember to embrace the new and changing you and always remind yourself that there are many women in the world who would give anything to be in your position. Feel proud of your new body; give it the respect that you know it deserves.

Don’t for a minute think that because you’re now pregnant and your body is undergoing changes that you can’t be sexy or look sexy. If you want have a make over, change your hairstyle, experiment with new looks that enhance the changing you. There are many stores catering to pregnant women with rather fashionable casual and evening wear.You can also try wearing new makeup. Avon UK has really great offers and their products are of the best quality. mama-la-mode.com too have great maternity wear and the quality is excellent. You could make it a girls day out and do a spot of makeup shopping. Also consider buying lingerie to accentuate your new curves. As ridiculous as the next point may seem, it works. Try to act sexier than you actually feel. Studies have shown that acting can affect feeling. If you smile you release the chemicals that you would do if you were actually smiling. Acting unsexy or miserable can have a knock on effect on you and those around you. Always strive to be positive even if on that particular day you’re feeling down in the dumps, the ill feeling will pass.

Make sure to share your body and this is not only in a sexual way. Include him by having him caress your bump and feeling when the baby kicks. Do not hide your body which may suggest you are ashamed. It is expected that you will get bigger especially your tummy and this should be a sign of your blossoming self and pregnancy. I remember finding it quite fun when month by month my husband would take side view photos of our growing bump. Create these memories together, cherish them, archive them so the family will have pics to look back on and reminisce. Spend as much time together as you can before the baby arrives. Plan a trip or holiday together. Take evening walks, this is good both for you and the baby and gives you that much time to spend together before things get even more exciting and hectic.

Another thing you should remember is the best time most usually for those cheeky retreats are in the middle months of your pregnancy. Don’t get caught out in just humouring your partner. If you have no desire for him you can snuggle up and watch your favourite DVD or simply cuddle together and chat. There is also the option of engaging in oral sex. Unless you find that you are uncomfortable receiving you can decide to treat him to it. There is no rule against either of you engaging each other in this way. To be absolutely certain that it is safe for you consult your physician or midwife. They are all there to help and give advice. This is a special time for both of you, yes there will always be other concerns; finances, childcare, jobs and the list goes on. But as best as you can, try not to let it burden you or your partner. Together you both can work through it and if a single mom take comfort in the fact that many women have done it, yes it was a challenge but I firmly believe we are not given more than we can bear. To all expectant mother’s and partners all the best with the pregnancy and take it one day at a time.